Move on?

Memories and colours, dulled and faded
The dust of time blurring faces
Tears dried
the trail not seen anymore
The constant throbbing pain dulled.

The weary soul burdened.
Hurt as it turns a corner,
stumbling into an alley of past moments,
Spent holding hands, tender kisses.

Trudging along, each passing second,
nothing awaits, no one awaits.
A smile of past lingers.

Fooled heart, with hopes of change
Trying to move on, move along.
To make sense of chaos,
dreams and reality merging.
I try to live.

Intezaar

My first attempt at writing an Urdu poem. Inspired by "Sheeshon ka maseeha" by Faiz Ahmed Faiz, below is sort of a reply to the inspiration.

Daaman hai khoon se ranga hua,
karte hue ekat'ha dil ke tukdon ko
Sheeshey sa woh chaknachoor jo hua,
ek jaam ke pyaale sa.

Kya jaano tum inn tootey tukdon se
kitne rangon se khil jaata hai samaa.
ek chehra tumhara dekhu jo unmein,
hazaaron aks nazar aate hai.

Maseeha koi nahi milega iss raah per,
zindagi khud hi chalti hai.
bikharti hai, sawarti hai,
Girkar phir sambhalti hai.
Humein hai sab ye gawaara,
ke mohsin har kisike naseeb nahi hota.

Intezaar karna tumhaara, meri khwaash hai
kaayam hai meri ye saanse tab tak.
Justajoo koi rahi nahi,
dil ko sameit, samjha hai diya.
Raah per nazrey tikaaye hum bathey rahenge chauraahe per
bin palkey jhapkaaye hue.
Kisi din toh Khuda karam karega,
ya tum lautogey, ya maut ye jaan le jaayegi.

Pain

I stand at that point
where yesterday seems so ancient
where tomorrow is so far
where each smile is so painful
soul strewn with scars.

There is light at the end of the tunnel
they say.
There is hope they say
for all that you want to come true
all that we live with for.

It is never so easy
to be carefree
to be like the bird in the sky.
To keep that smile lightened
to be what you want.

Struggle is a part of life they say
why not it should be, they ask.
Where are they when you need them
understand you without a word spoken.

(PS: Toothache, headache and ulcer on tongue with travel plans with these is not good)

Coffee high-ness

Who would have thunk, i would be drunk
On none but you, pretty tell me what to do.

You have me curled, you have me blued
you make go flitty and "oh what to do!"

I sit and stare, through the conversations we share,
stare dazed, while i marvel at you.

The incoherent things i say
i put the blame on you.
You are the caffeine running in my blood
the one that makes me giggle and wonder,
wonder "what happened to you?!"

Mi Amour

As the shadows of sadness
come creeping by
I wish I could hide you in me
Let them get me, crumble me
Let them twist my arm
I shall surrender to the ghosts of fear
I will smile as they burn my soul
I will die in bliss with the thought
That you are safe
That my love won at last
That I had you

The one thing

If i could ask for just one thing
It would be to be your love

To make you smile and cheer you up
When there is sadness and worry
To hug you and kiss you
When the troubles get by

It would me my first and last wish
To be near your heart
To be the love of your life

Suffocate

Struggling, clinging
to the tiniest hope
Trying to breath.
Comatosed.
There's deepening darkness, suffocating, killing
Bleeding to death.
Happy thoughts fail to conjure.
The curtains are falling on the stage of life.
Premature end of the drama queen.
The mask has washed away, ugliness
Revealed shame
Left alone scared of own wishes
Drifting away.